The first thought that came to mind when my boyfriend and I took the difficult decision to move out of our little London flat and back to our parents was failure. Just as we were getting to that point of getting excited over indoor plants, candles and a small glass of wine in the evening, Covid-19 impacted our plans and meant for the moment we had to put that part of our lives on hold and move back to our parents' homes.
In my head, moving back with your parents feels like a step backwards, as if erasing any kind of progress you've made towards being a semi-sufficient adult, even if all you've managed to do in that time is learn how to boil an egg, and even now I still can't do that very well... I've always enjoyed having my independence and I instantly worried that I would regress to pre-university me, who wasn't particularly domesticated (still not blessed in this area if I'm honest).
Of course, this is a situation that so many of us have had to face due to Covid-19, whether you've lost your job, your business, a loved one due to the pandemic or are waiting on furlough. It has required everyone to make drastic or sudden changes just to keep going and I am far from alone in this. I am incredibly lucky to have been able to work throughout Covid-19 and to have been able to come home to my family who have supported me through everything, which not everyone has.
I also have more space to work with, and loved sitting out in the garden or in the summer house when the weather was warmer, so undoubtedly my working from set-up is much healthier than before. It has felt like more of a crowded house recently as my Dad permanently works from home and my sister has just moved from her office to working from home as well so it will be interesting to see how we manage the challenges around personal space and the amount of time we're around each other over the next few weeks.
It feels strange to be between places. I would best compare it to sitting in a train station waiting room. Although I'm enjoying the home comforts I don't want to sign up for things like the gym, the doctors or a new dentist because I simply don't know how long I'll be back for and where I'll be living next. London had started to feel like home and whilst I like my hometown, I don't feel close to it with so few of my friends nearby and the difficulty to get out during the week because work is busy at the moment.
I've always been someone who worries about the future and the next step, so it's the first time in a while that I have no future plans and that is scary to me. Additionally, I lived in London for two and a half years and I don't know if I will be living there again for a while which I am sad about. In practical terms it's unclear if it's worth moving back there if I'm not working in an office 5 days a week in the future, but part of me really misses the lifestyle, the amazing restaurants and things to do and the independence I had.
After the government advice on working from home changed again this week, after only a few weeks ago encouraging people back into offices, it's hard to know what to do next and I do miss living in London but the risk should I move back and arrive to a lockdown seems a bit high.
So I'll sit tight in my mini-purgatory for another few weeks and wait and see. Being in lockdown in our little flat at the start of the pandemic felt quite brutal at times and it definitely tested Jack and I! Therefore I'm cautious about moving back to London too quickly and I should enjoy being back with my family for a while I wait to make new plans again.
Are you in a similar situation? How have you coped with changing circumstances?
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